I interviewed my brother Rudy about becoming a first time dad. He talks about some favorite memories with his child Luca and how he felt in some moments like when he found out he was becoming a dad. He also gives advice to other first time parents.
Transcript:
Abigail Hernandez: Okay, hello.
Rudy Hernandez: Hello.
AH: What is your name and age?
RH: My name is Rudy and I am 26 years old.
AH: Okay, um, what is your child’s name and how old is your child?
RH: He is… a year and a half and his name is Luca.
AH: [clears throat] First question, what were some of your thoughts- what were some of your thoughts when you found out you were going to be a dad?
RH: Um… I was…obviously a little scared but, more so wondering what it would takes to be a dad and how we were going to take care of him because we were still quite young, still are young. So just trying to figure out how that would fit in our current lifestyle.
AH: Oh okay..
RH: Mhm.
AH: What was your current lifestyle…again?
RH: Uh we were living with a roommate at the time so of course we needed to move out and get out own place.
AH: Oh yea I remember that.
RH: So that, um, Luca could have…somewhere to be- somewhere that was more baby appropriate.
AH: Mhm, okay um what day did you guys go to the hospital…for Luca?
RH: What day?
AH: Yea, if you remember.
RH: Well Luca was…he didn’t come out naturally, he was a little late, so we went…on August 3rd I think it was a Thursday.
AH: Oh-
RH: August 3rd to go get my wife induced…
AH: Mhm.
RH: And then we were in the hospital for… for about 24 hours 32 hours I think.
AH: Okay, oh yea, didn’t you have to like sleep on the couch?
RH: Uh I didn’t have to sleep on a couch there was a-another bed in the room and nobody else was in the room so-
Ah: But then you didn’t fit.
RH: Yea, I didn’t really fit but it’s fine.
AH: Alright. But what was it like in the hospital?
RH: Um…it was fine I mean it wasn’t as bad as other-other guys will say cause again I got kinda lucky in the room that we got there wasn’t… we didn’t have any neighbors it was just us in the room.
AH: Mhm.
RH: But it was a little…uhm…scary at times because you just feel like the machines beeping and you don’t mean if that means something good or bad is happening.
AH: Oh, oh wait so they wouldn’t like tell you like what was happening kind of-
RH: Well cause the nurses-well the nurses would come in after they did all the testing they needed to do and then they would leave and they would just have all the machines hooked up which just monitors the baby’s like heart rate and breathing and stuff and then…whenever uhm she would get contractions on the screen there was like little lines that would jump up.
AH: Mhm.
RH: So you just kinda like watch that and be like [inaudible] and stuff.
AH: Oh okay. Alright what are like-what is like a daily routine look like for Luca and everything?
RH: Daily routine for Luca is-
AH: Like for the weekdays and or weekends.
RH: Okay I get, we’ll just start with the weekdays, so well wake up-he will usually wake up around…seven, seven thirty, but if he’s not up by then we’ll probably have to wake him up cause on Mondays we’ll have to take him to his Tia’s house so she can watch him while we work.
AH: Mhm.
RH: And then he’ll-we’ll pick him up after work and he’ll come home eat dinner, take a bath, and then go to bed and the weekend is…kinda the same…
AH: Mhm.
RH: Of course not us not taking him to his Tia’s house so-
AH: Mhm.
RH: [clears throat] He wakes up and we watch TV in bed for a little but cause he likes to watch Rubble and Crew or Blues Clues and then he’ll have some milk and then we’ll have breakfast and he’ll play for little bit and then he’ll go down for a nap…[loudly breathes] and then he’ll wake up and we’ll go to the park or we’ll just stay at the house.
AH: Okay.
RH: Unless we have something else to do.
AH: Okay.
RH: Mhm.
AH: Um what are like just some random things that Luca has like done or what he does like just random things?
RH: Mmm..
[door opens]
RH: He likes to jump on the bed-
Rebeca Garcia (Rudy’s wife): Pizza’s here.
RH: He loves to jump on the bed um…
[door closes]
RH: He loves to run around. He falls a million times a day because he loves to just… I don’t know, that’s just what he loves to do, he loves to run and jump and fall.
AH: Haha. Anyways, umm, that’s it or are there anymore?
RH: Mmm…I think that’s it.
AH: Okay, um what are-what are some of your favorite memories you have of Luca?
RH: Hmm… of course when he was born.
AH: Yea.
RH: And then…[clearing throat] just watching him learn how to do… just learn how to do certain things, like we built his little kitchen for Christmas and just watching him just play. Just figure out how to… like what it is to do to play I guess. If that makes sense.
AH: Oh yea Sophie- Sophie cooked me broccoli in the microwave-
RH: She cooked you broccoli [laughs]
AH: Yea.
RH: But yea it’s just cute watching him go around and learn how- what- what toys to use I guess.
AH: Mhm. Okay um what- this one you don’t need to have a full blown like answer for cause he’s like…really still a child. But what are, like, some that you will have set up for Luca and like and other stuff like that when he is older?
RH: When he is older…
AH: Yea, like phones and like chores.
RH: Uh I mean of course I’ll have him want to keep his room clean and do his homework and all just all the normal stuff.
AH: Yea.
RH: But as long as he follows the rules and is respectful to his- to him and the people- to like his parents and the people around him.
AH: Mhm.
RH: Then I think that’s really…
AH: Please tell me you’re never going to have him read everyday.
RH: No, I mean if he does like to read, that’d be good and reading is important but I’m not going to force him to… to read if he doesn’t have to.
AH: Okay…um how- so far how has the experience been as a first time father?
RH: It’s been everything from amazing, to terrible, to stressful…to…one of the best things at the same time – it’s everything.
AH: Uh huh.
RH: It’s not one thing at once but overall I would say it’s good. [laughs]
AH: Okay. Um what- this one is kind of like a two thing question but its like what if-what advice do you wish you would have gotten when you were first becoming a parent? Or advice you have gotten?
RH: …I’m sorry could you repeat the question.
AH: what [clears throat] what advice do you wish like people would have given you when you were first becoming a dad or like questions- I mean-I forgot my words- um, what advice do you wish that you would have gotten when you become a first time dad?
RH: Mm, just don’t sweat the small stuff because at the end of the day there’s not going to be a manual. You could read as many books or as many…opinions or whatever you want on what’s the correct way to do something for your kid but every child is going to be different, has different umm taste, and behaviors, and whatever and not everybody’s life is the same either so it’s kind of like you just take it day by day, one thing at a time, and everything- you’re going to figure everything out, it’s not going to be as…hard or you’re not going to find your answer in a book, it’s just there’s no way.
AH: Okay, and then what advice do you have for other people who are becoming first time parents?
RH: It would just be…it would be kinda the same thing, you know, take it day by day, don’t take it too hard, like for example right now we are struggling with um him eating, um certain foods, like he’s not overall very picky but I don’t know for some reason why he’s just not wanting to eat his food, but you know as long as he eats food, whatever, it could be a piece of bread or some fruit for the day, sometimes that’s all a kid is gonna want to eat and sometimes you’ll make them a meal and they’ll work really hard and-and then in the kitchen think about how ooh I know you really like this and this and then you’ll put it together and they will just throw it in your face and it’s not because they’re being mean its just cause they’re just kids so don’t take it too hard.
AH: Has he ever thrown food in your face?
RH: Not in my face but he’s thrown it at the floor and then he’ll like grab it with his hands and then just like squish it in and play with it.
AH: Oh yea I think he did that today…
RH: Yea.
AH: Earlier.
RH: And it will feel disrespectful but it’s like, again, just don’t sweat the small stuff it’s like-you know he’s a kid. Just… remember he’s just a kid or they’re just kids, there’s nothing you could do about it, they’re learning day by day.
AH: Okay well that’s all my questions goodbye.
RH: Later.
